Nevaeha was in ps the longest- from pre-k to mid year fourth. She was repeatedly bullied, threatened, her work was stolen and she was told, on more than one occasion, to keep her faith to herself. I pushed her and in hindsight I wish I hadn't. I thought it was good for her to experience what the world was full of, to witness to those who wouldn't have ever known, that it would build strength and endurance in her. I was wrong. It crushed her. At the end she vomited daily. She sobbed before school, coming off the bus and at night. I saw her withdraw from us. Her happy demeanor changed and she dreaded every single day. She had no friends. No one would talk to her because of her values. She didn't dress like they did, she didn't listen to the same music or watch the same movies. They teased her and poked fun. They made up nasty rumors trying to ruin her reputation. Several trips to the school in the principal's office did nothing to change the situation.
Chenoa was in school until mid-year second grade. She was born mute, had a seizure disorder, GI issues, Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD) and didn't begin to speak until around 3 when her Birth to Three services expired. In order for us to obtain school services, we were told she would need to be enrolled in early pre-k. Not knowing any different, I put my 3 year old on a bus and watched her go to school. Her speech improved until kindergarten at 5 years old. Then it halted and began to regress. Despite my desperate pleas for her to be withheld, it was refused. She was pushed into first grade. First grade moved far too fast for her. Her sounds were still confusing and some she still had not developed the ability to use, thus making reading and spelling quite impossible. She does have a remarkable memory though and would memorize the weekly book. She became so good at this, she would fool anyone not paying attention. She could read the weekly book to me, not even looking at it and would know what it said on each page, even when scrambled. She can pull a pattern out of most anything as well. When I confronted the teacher with this information, I was dismissed as being an overbearing, worrisome mother that needed to let go some. I told the school teachers I was concerned it was moving too fast, that she cried in the evening and was frustrated. I wanted her IEP changed, yet they said they saw no reason to do that. They said she was doing fine. This meeting happened in November. In January I demanded another meeting. At this meeting the tables were turned and they stated she was struggling and failing, that more work at home was needed (we often were at the table all night just doing assigned homework). At this point I was angry and frustrated. I couldn't push her any harder or expect any more from her. Mid year first grade, she couldn't read, she couldn't add, and they were fine with pushing her through.
Silas, my son, was in school for half a year of pre-k. He was 4 years old. I put him there because I thought he needed the "socialization." He was such a quiet boy. However, he was withdrawn there too. He refused to play with others, he refused to listen at story time, he refused to do group center, he always wandered back to a corner alone. When I asked him why he chose not to play with others, he simply said he didn't like them, and they teased him. In February of 2013 a teacher threw a ball at him in gym class. He fell over the ball, and busted his face and ear on the gym floor. Instead of calling me (I am very involved with my children, and they knew I would be there in a heartbeat) they told him to walk it off, get over it. No accident report was filed, I was not called, he did not see a nurse or get ice for his injury. He was forced to sit for 6 hours in pain. When he got off the bus, he was trembling and screaming hysterically while holding his ear. I immediately rushed him to the doctor's office where the doctor stated he had cauliflower ear, the cartilage was severely damaged and all that could be done was to ice it and rotate pain medication. (This occurred on a Friday.) Monday morning I contacted the Board of Education and CPS. I documented his injuries to the fullest extent. The BOE covered the teacher at fault, denied everything and CPS stated that nothing was documented and everyone acted clueless. My children haven't set foot in a public school since. (I will add, that I don't think public school is a rotten terrible place. I don't want people reading to think I broadly categorize all public schools and teachers in this manner, because I definitely do not. Our experience wasn't a common one. I know that there are many Christian educators in our public schools that deeply care about and love their students. There are also schools that remain diligent in ensuring that students are protected.)
I was afraid when we began our homeschooling journey. I believed the common myth that homeschool kids aren't socialized. Honestly it was the main reason I kept mine in public school so long. I didn't know where to start, what to do, or who to even talk to. A friend gave me the local support group number and from there, many moms in the group reached out to me and my family. They gave us tools to work with and showed me where to start. For that I am eternally thankful. In hindsight, I didn't like the road that was traveled, but I'm glad it led us here. I can't imagine turning back. The growth I've seen in my children has been astounding. It's not only been academic, but spiritually in their relationship with Christ, as a family, socially, and developmentally. It brings my heart such great joy to witness these things! If God calls He will equip and He will complete the work He starts!!
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